Consortium Response #3: Pick a Poem

For your third forum response, please select a school-appropriate poem and copy and paste the text of it here. Your ORIGINAL response should identify word choices, details, and sound/structural elements within your selected poem that help to enhance meaning and mood. Your two responses to OTHER people should response similarly to the poems and analyses of other people.

Remember to follow the rules of forum posting as set on our class website under the tab "Creative Consortium." You must post an original response of your own AND two replies to two classmates' responses in order to receive full credit for this assignment. DO NOT CREATE NEW TOPICS WHEN RESPONDING TO THIS PROMPT; simply respond WITHIN this topic.

DUE DATE/TIME: Wednesday, March 6 (responses must be posted no later than 8:00 AM)

Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Chops"
because that was the name of his dog
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and a gold star
And his mother hung it on the kitchen door
and read it to his aunts
That was the year Father Tracy
took all the kids to the zoo
And he let them sing on the bus
And his little sister was born
with tiny toenails and no hair
And his mother and father kissed a lot
And the girl around the corner sent him a
Valentine signed with a row of X's
and he had to ask his father what the X's meant
And his father always tucked him in bed at night
And was always there to do it
Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Autumn"
because that was the name of the season
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and asked him to write more clearly
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because of its new paint
And the kids told him
that Father Tracy smoked cigars
And left butts on the pews
And sometimes they would burn holes
That was the year his sister got glasses
with thick lenses and black frames
And the girl around the corner laughed
when he asked her to go see Santa Claus
And the kids told him why
his mother and father kissed a lot
And his father never tucked him in bed at night
And his father got mad
when he cried for him to do it.
Once on a paper torn from his notebook
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Innocence: A Question"
because that was the question about his girl
And that's what it was all about
And his professor gave him an A
and a strange steady look
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because he never showed her
That was the year that Father Tracy died
And he forgot how the end
of the Apostle's Creed went
And he caught his sister
making out on the back porch
And his mother and father never kissed
or even talked
And the girl around the corner
wore too much makeup
That made him cough when he kissed her
but he kissed her anyway
because that was the thing to do
And at three a.m. he tucked himself into bed
his father snoring soundly
That's why on the back of a brown paper bag
he tried another poem
And he called it "Absolutely Nothing"
Because that's what it was really all about
And he gave himself an A
and a slash on each damned wrist
And he hung it on the bathroom door
because this time he didn't think
he could reach the kitchen.

This poem is from the novel, "The Perks of Being a Wallflower". The poem starts out happy and hopeful, and then leads to darkness and powerfulness. In the beginning, the boy writes a very good, childish poem, and everything is perfect in his life. Then, he starts to understand things more and see that his life is draining. He decides that his life is so bad that he needs to commit suicide at the end of the poem. Words like "slash", "damned", and "died" give the poem a dark feeling like something bad is going to happen. Words like "gold", "star", and "kids" give it a lighter, happier feel.

Sitting on the steps, looking across the lake,
Wondering why, life at times, can seem great.
But in that second, it took me to just think,
My life could change, faster than a blink.

Is this a reason why we should always cherish?
Not knowing when loved ones may suddenly perish.
Living everyday, like it was our very last,
for our days could be very long or go by very fast

So I'll cherish and take nothing for granted,
not say things that shouldn't be chanted.
If this is the last day I have on this earth,
I accept my life, for what it's been worth.

Tomorrow isn't promised to young or old alike,
Today may be the last day I'm able to hold you tight.
Don't wait for tomorrow, do it all today,
If tomorrow never comes, you'll never regret a day.

Source: Like It Is My Very Last, For Alexis From Your Mama, Dream Poem http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/like-it-is-my-very-last#ixzz2MhUuSr33
www.FamilyFriendPoems.com

This poem starts out very happy and calm. As you read the poem, it transitions from a happy reader to a reader that is doubtful and pessimistic. The poem has an AABB rhyme scheme which helps the flow of the poem. The words "last" "wait" "never" and "regret" show a sense of anger which changes the mood of the poem from very light and happy, to very dark and second-guessing.

Mother to Son
Langston Hughes

Well, son, I'll tell you:
Life for me ain't been no crystal stair.
It's had tacks in it,
And splinters,
And boards torn up,
And places with no carpet on the floor—
Bare.
But all the time
I'se been a-climbin' on,
And reachin' landin's,
And turnin' corners,
And sometimes goin' in the dark
Where there ain't been no light.
So, boy, don't you turn back.
Don't you set down on the steps.
'Cause you finds it's kinder hard.
Don't you fall now—
For I'se still goin', honey,
I'se still climbin',
And life for me ain't been no crystal stair.

In Hughes’s poem there is a feeling that the speaker has not had everything in life easy when she describes it using words like “tacks”, “splinters”, “boards torn up”, and “no carpet on the floor”. All of these word choices lead to the feeling that they have not always had an easy life, and also give a negative view on how their life was. Although their life has not been perfect she is telling her son how he should not give up because something becomes more challenging. She says “…don’t you turn back./Don’t you set down on the steps.” Telling her son to never give up and discussing the troubles from her own life together gives her a different perspective compared to someone who has had an easy life. If her son’s life is hard then he can relate to her which gives her message of perseverance a stronger meaning.

What I Love About You

I love the way you look at me,
Your eyes so bright and blue.
I love the way you kiss me,
Your lips so soft and smooth.

I love the way you make me so happy,
And the ways you show you care.
I love the way you say, "I Love You,"
And the way you're always there.

I love the way you touch me,
Always sending chills down my spine.
I love that you are with me,
And glad that you are mine.

- Crystal Jansen -



Jansen's use of a simple structure and rhyme scheme keep up the steady, happy tone of the poem. Her word choice throughout the poem adds to the upbeat mood. She uses words such as bright, love, kiss, soft, and mine to show her love for the person the poem is about. The poet repeatedly uses soft sounding letters that also reflect the mood of the poem, such as w, l, and m. Details such as "sending chills down my spine" and "your eyes so bright and blue" all work together to convey the carefree and loving mood.

[quote="gbs13"]Mother to Son
Langston Hughes

Well, son, I'll tell you:
Life for me ain't been no crystal stair.
It's had tacks in it,
And splinters,
And boards torn up,
And places with no carpet on the floor—
Bare.
But all the time
I'se been a-climbin' on,
And reachin' landin's,
And turnin' corners,
And sometimes goin' in the dark
Where there ain't been no light.
So, boy, don't you turn back.
Don't you set down on the steps.
'Cause you finds it's kinder hard.
Don't you fall now—
For I'se still goin', honey,
I'se still climbin',
And life for me ain't been no crystal stair.

In Hughes’s poem there is a feeling that the speaker has not had everything in life easy when she describes it using words like “tacks”, “splinters”, “boards torn up”, and “no carpet on the floor”. All of these word choices lead to the feeling that they have not always had an easy life, and also give a negative view on how their life was. Although their life has not been perfect she is telling her son how he should not give up because something becomes more challenging. She says “…don’t you turn back./Don’t you set down on the steps.” Telling her son to never give up and discussing the troubles from her own life together gives her a different perspective compared to someone who has had an easy life. If her son’s life is hard then he can relate to her which gives her message of perseverance a stronger meaning.
[/quote]

I love your choice in poetry. I've heard this before but I forgot it existed until now! Your response is thorough and hits all the points that it was supposed to. The only thing you might want to look into is the structure of the poem. I think that the poet structured it the way she did because her life wasn't east and predictable, so the combination of short and longer lines and the lack of rhyme reflect that well. Nice work!

[quote="seguin199"]Sitting on the steps, looking across the lake,
Wondering why, life at times, can seem great.
But in that second, it took me to just think,
My life could change, faster than a blink.

Is this a reason why we should always cherish?
Not knowing when loved ones may suddenly perish.
Living everyday, like it was our very last,
for our days could be very long or go by very fast

So I'll cherish and take nothing for granted,
not say things that shouldn't be chanted.
If this is the last day I have on this earth,
I accept my life, for what it's been worth.

Tomorrow isn't promised to young or old alike,
Today may be the last day I'm able to hold you tight.
Don't wait for tomorrow, do it all today,
If tomorrow never comes, you'll never regret a day.

Source: Like It Is My Very Last, For Alexis From Your Mama, Dream Poem http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/like-it-is-my-very-last#ixzz2MhUuSr33
www.FamilyFriendPoems.com

This poem starts out very happy and calm. As you read the poem, it transitions from a happy reader to a reader that is doubtful and pessimistic. The poem has an AABB rhyme scheme which helps the flow of the poem. The words "last" "wait" "never" and "regret" show a sense of anger which changes the mood of the poem from very light and happy, to very dark and second-guessing. [/quote]

I like this poem a lot! I thought your response was interesting because I took out a very different mood than you. I don't get a dark mood out of this poem, but rather a "live like you're dying" kind of view. The poet realizes, maybe from a loss of his or her own, that life can be taken from you at any time. Because of this, she decides to not waste any time and live every moment to the fullest. It's interesting how two different people can read the same poem and take it two totally different ways!

I really liked your chioce of poem, but I'm not sure that I totally agree with you on how the speaker transitions to anger. When I read this poem I thought that it was a person who is realizing how they could die at any random time and who wants to then seize their life and take advantage that of the fact that they still are alive. Good job though!

I thought that you had a really good response. I liked, and agree with you when you say that the steadiness of the rhyme scheme effects the tone. I also liked how you talked about how the soft sounds of some of the words effects the mood as well. I didn't think about that so much until you brought that up. Good Job!

[u]Enigma[/u]
The noblest name in Allegory's page,
The hand that traced inexorable rage;
A pleasing moralist whose page refined,
Displays the deepest knowledge of the mind;
A tender poet of a foreign tongue,
(Indited in the language that he sung.)
A bard of brilliant but unlicensed page
At once the shame and glory of our age,
The prince of harmony and stirling sense,
The ancient dramatist of eminence,
The bard that paints imagination's powers,
And him whose song revives departed hours,
Once more an ancient tragic bard recall,
In boldness of design surpassing all.
These names when rightly read, a name [make] known
Which gathers all their glories in its own.
-Edgar Allan Poe



This poem uses rhyme to accomplish poem that flows really well throughout the entire piece. Poe also makes the last 2 lines stand out by making them slightly longer than the other lines in the poem. Poe also uses alliteration in the poem like "noblest name", "displays the deepest knowledge", and "bard of brilliant but unlicensed page."

I think how the mother talks gives away a new meaning to the poem; the dialect gives a sense of intimacy to the poem, it feels like how a mother really talks to their son when they are alone. I also think the stairs are a metaphor for life. Where the mother says that there have been "splinters" and "tacks" and "boards torn up" show a metaphor for life; kind of like that old saying that "life has many twists and turns" but in this case the analogy is a staircase, not a roller coaster or something.

This poem uses rhyme to accomplish a sense of flow within the piece. Many words in the 2nd and 3rd stanzas use negative words to show a changing mood or idea the author has. The use of repetition for some words like "tomorrow" in the 3rd stanza give a sense of urgency to the days that you have and what you can complete in those days.

"Crocodile" by Lewis Carroll

How doth the little crocodile
Improve his shining tail,
And pour the waters of the Nile
On every golden scale!

How cheerfully he seems to grin!
How neatly spread his claws,
And welcomes little fishes in
With gently smiling jaws!

The poem begins with pleasant, innocent imagery, using language such as "little crocodile" and "golden scale" to achieve this. In the second stanza, dark and horrible imagery is mixed in without varying the style of word choice, creating a eerie juxtaposition of childish language (such as "cheerfully", "grin", and "little fishes") with the idea of a devious crocodile devouring unsuspecting fish.

[quote="seguin199"] This poem starts out very happy and calm. As you read the poem, it transitions from a happy reader to a reader that is doubtful and pessimistic. The poem has an AABB rhyme scheme which helps the flow of the poem. The words "last" "wait" "never" and "regret" show a sense of anger which changes the mood of the poem from very light and happy, to very dark and second-guessing. [/quote]

Nice response, but I can't quite agree with you on the mood. I think that the poem is chronicling someone's uplifting epiphany that they should live life to it's fullest, thus removing the possibility of regret.

"Fire and Ice" by Robert Frost

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.

-Original response: I realize that I picked an exceedingly short poem, however, there is so much that can be derived from this small poem. When Frost uses words like fire, ice, great, hate, end, destruction, and perish, it creates a very dark, depressing, and sort of unforgiving mood. Based on the poem, Frost believes ice is the worst choice of the two, thus, he "[holds] with those who favor fire". However, he feels no remorse over saying that he knows the world is hateful enough to deserve the latter (lines 4-6). This expresses Frost's lack of mercy towards mankind. Also, it seems as if Frost sees how cruel the world is but accepts the fact that he can't change it which brings up the depressing side of the poem's mood.

@DTMF
I loved your poem choice. I agree that Poe uses alliteration. I believe he uses it to contribute to the simple, appreciative mood. In the last two lines, "These names when rightly read, a name [make] known/ Which gathers all their glories in its own." Show the appreciative side because the poem is about a good friend of Poe's (Sara) that had helped him through really hard times in his life.

@31544
Your poem is awesome! I was expecting this adorable crocodile that just walked about but suddenly he eats all the little fish. I loved it. The use of innocent word choices mixed with the idea of deception reminded me of children being robbed of their innocence unknowingly. It happens when we all grow up. Everyone (that is older than us) smiles and brushes it off as if losing something so pure isn't really a big deal. They deceive us. That's probably really far-fetched on my part but that is what it reminded me of.

[quote="gbs13"]

In Hughes’s poem there is a feeling that the speaker has not had everything in life easy when she describes it using words like “tacks”, “splinters”, “boards torn up”, and “no carpet on the floor”. All of these word choices lead to the feeling that they have not always had an easy life, and also give a negative view on how their life was. Although their life has not been perfect she is telling her son how he should not give up because something becomes more challenging. She says “…don’t you turn back./Don’t you set down on the steps.” Telling her son to never give up and discussing the troubles from her own life together gives her a different perspective compared to someone who has had an easy life. If her son’s life is hard then he can relate to her which gives her message of perseverance a stronger meaning.
[/quote]

I agree with everything you say here. I think that his mother may also be trying to imply that she is better for her hardships, and that if her life had been a crystal stair she would not be who she is.

A Light in the Attic
Shel Silverstein

There's a light on in the attic.
Though the house is dark and shuttered,
I can see a flickerin' flutter,
And I know what it's about.
There's a light on in the attic.
I can see it from the outside.
And I know you're on the inside... lookin' out.

Although this is short poem, and can be found in one of the author's books for children, the poem is something that can be enjoyed by older people as well. Phrases like "dark and shuttered" and "I know you're on the inside" are darker, and sort of accusing, not something you'd expect to find in a children's book, but good poetry nontheless.

The Crocodile has been one of my favorite poems since i was little. I'm very glad you chose this poem. The rhyme, the meter, the sing-songy-ness makes the sharpness of crocodile fade away. It becomes more of a silly story than a dark one, by using words like "doth," "little," "shining," "golden," "cheerfully," "neatly," "welcomes," "gently," and "smiling" so disguise the harsher words like "claws" and "jaws".

I liked how you chose a children's poem with such a mature meaning. I agree that the structure is very novice while the word choice and phrases express something very mature and adult. I really loved this poem, even though it was just a children's poem!

A Summer Mood
by: Augusta Davies Webster

BUT wait. Let each by each the days pass by,
One faded and one blown like summer flowers;
What need of hope, with summer in the sky?
What of regret, with all fair morrows ours?
If yesterday be gone,No reck, 'twas not alone,
To-morrow will have just so sweet long hours.
But yet to-day is sweetest till 'tis flown.

But wait. Let summer day be changed from day,
Like following surges of the ebb and flow;
And flow brings breath of saltness and blithe spray,
And ebb long music of seas plashing low.
The waves, stolen out of reach
,Have no farewell for speech;
Next tide will roll as swift, as rippling go.
And yet 'tis now that's best along the beach.

Ah wait. The while we linger our lives live,
Our summer ripens purpose through our dreams;
Flower-petals fallen leave a seed to thrive,
Spent tides heap treasures from the deep sea streams;
Now drifts by unaware,
And Afterwards is heir;
To-morrow wins the wealth of yester gleams.
Yet 'tis to-day that summer makes most fair.

This poem is saying that even though the future is bright and looks like a great place to be, Now is just as good. It is showing that growing up isn't a race, and that it is important to realize the beauty of today rather than just the importance of tomorrow. Each stanza uses words like "ripen", "seed", and "changed" to show that the future is going to be a brilliant place to be, but then Webster ends each stanza with the repeating of the point that today is the best, and that today is the day that is "sweetest" "best" and "most fair".

[quote="Dark Woods"]Although this is short poem, and can be found in one of the author's books for children, the poem is something that can be enjoyed by older people as well. Phrases like "dark and shuttered" and "I know you're on the inside" are darker, and sort of accusing, not something you'd expect to find in a children's book, but good poetry nontheless.[/quote]

I saw those word choices as being used as a warning then as accusing, although I see how you saw that. I saw this poem as a heavily veiled attempt at a "don't judge a book by it's cover" cliche because even though the house is dark and shuttered, and even though it looks old and possibly abandoned, there is still someone on the inside. I also saw the house as a symbol for a person. So I saw the poem as a warning to the reader that even though a person may look old and decrepit, or even though a person may look tough, there is still a person inside and judgments based on looks can hurt people.

[quote="Jungleboogie"]

-Original response: I realize that I picked an exceedingly short poem, however, there is so much that can be derived from this small poem. When Frost uses words like fire, ice, great, hate, end, destruction, and perish, it creates a very dark, depressing, and sort of unforgiving mood. Based on the poem, Frost believes ice is the worst choice of the two, thus, he "[holds] with those who favor fire". However, he feels no remorse over saying that he knows the world is hateful enough to deserve the latter (lines 4-6). This expresses Frost's lack of mercy towards mankind. Also, it seems as if Frost sees how cruel the world is but accepts the fact that he can't change it which brings up the depressing side of the poem's mood.
[/quote]

I saw this poem as a juxtaposition of two extreme emotions. One being hate, and the other being raw intense passion. The hate embodied by the ice and the passion embodied by the fire. I also saw the "ending the world" thing to be a symbol for allowing those emotions to completely overtake one's entire being as those emotions are often known to do. Frost says that as he has experienced passion, he would have to say that it bis the more exciting and possibly fun emotion to be enveloped in, but then he knows that hate is unfortunately the more common of the two in the human world and so he allows for the fact that if so many people allow themselves to be overcome by hatred, that hatred must be a pretty powerful and great emotion as well.

Beauty
by Robert Nathan

Beauty is ever to the lonely mind
A shadow fleeting; she is never plain.
She is a visitor who leaves behind
The gift of grief, the souvenir of pain.

For starters, this poem rhymes. The rhyme is used to evoke a larger meaning. For example the words that rhyme are "mind and behind" and "plain and pain". If one was to simply just reda the last words of each line they could guess as to what the meaning of the poem was about. There are not many details in this poem as it is very short. As for word choices the author uses "lonely" "pain" and "grief" as to symbolize the hardships and struggle of beauty. The sound element is the rhyme and the repetition of that "ind" sound reminds me off "I" or myself, and how beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The author uses "ain" which sort of reminds me of insane or inane. This he is proving that beauty is insane that no one will ever think of themselves as beautiful.

I believe this poem is about a person who just came to the realization of life's fragility. I agree with the point that it starts off more soft and gradually becomes more depressing. Good interpretation! The poem changes as the word choices become more solemn and angry, maybe the writer become mad as he was writing. Good job!

Although this is a children's poem, its meaning is far from childish. I like that it's mature and in a sense brings me back to when I used to play in my attic. It's playful and the word choices reflect that. But deeper meanings could still be brought out from within it. Nice choice!

Still I Rise by Maya Angelou
You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

Source: http://famouspoetsandpoems.com/poets/maya_angelou/poems/482

I chose this poem by Angelou because I think it is very inspiring. It gives off the theme that the narrator is empowered and will not give up. Angelous uses similes such as " 'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells pumping in my living room" to state that no one can bring her down, she will always come out on top. The repetition of "I'll rise" shows that she will always get back up, and will never just give in to people's cruel comments or pure hatred. I also like how the rhyme scene is just subtle enough to not overpower the poem or distract the reader, but further enhance the flow of the poem.

[quote="jemoria"]Beauty
by Robert Nathan

Beauty is ever to the lonely mind
A shadow fleeting; she is never plain.
She is a visitor who leaves behind
The gift of grief, the souvenir of pain.

For starters, this poem rhymes. The rhyme is used to evoke a larger meaning. For example the words that rhyme are "mind and behind" and "plain and pain". If one was to simply just reda the last words of each line they could guess as to what the meaning of the poem was about. There are not many details in this poem as it is very short. As for word choices the author uses "lonely" "pain" and "grief" as to symbolize the hardships and struggle of beauty. The sound element is the rhyme and the repetition of that "ind" sound reminds me off "I" or myself, and how beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The author uses "ain" which sort of reminds me of insane or inane. This he is proving that beauty is insane that no one will ever think of themselves as beautiful. [/quote]

I really liked your response, and especially agreed with what you said about the "ind" sound reminding you of "i" and that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

[quote="Dark Woods"]A Light in the Attic
Shel Silverstein

There's a light on in the attic.
Though the house is dark and shuttered,
I can see a flickerin' flutter,
And I know what it's about.
There's a light on in the attic.
I can see it from the outside.
And I know you're on the inside... lookin' out.

Although this is short poem, and can be found in one of the author's books for children, the poem is something that can be enjoyed by older people as well. Phrases like "dark and shuttered" and "I know you're on the inside" are darker, and sort of accusing, not something you'd expect to find in a children's book, but good poetry nontheless.[/quote]

I agree that it is odd to be in a children's book, it kind of gives off an eerie vibe. But I really like this poem and I think it is one of those things where the kid and adult view it completely different, some things may fly over the kid's head while the adult will read more into it and connect it to the bigger theme of the poem.

maggie and milly and molly and may
went down to the beach(to play one day)

and maggie discovered a shell that sang
so sweetly she couldn't remember her troubles,and

milly befriended a stranded star
whose rays five languid fingers were;

and molly was chased by a horrible thing
which raced sideways while blowing bubbles:and

may came home with a smooth round stone
as small as a world and as large as alone.

For whatever we lose(like a you or a me)
it's always ourselves we find in the sea

I love this poem's rhyme and the author's different sound elements. One of the first things that stands out about this poem is its use of parentheses. To me parentheses sound like someone whispering, and so the reader zooms into this part of the poem automatically. The poem as a whole gives off a playful mood, yet with a melancholy undertone: the line "as small as the world and as large as alone" really strikes me as beautiful and sad. It implies that loneliness is a horrible feeling in such a small world. The ending is quite nice as it wraps all these four characters in a happy ending, where the sea solves all the girls' troubles. Of course alliteration in the names of these girls helps the rhyme flow. Also significant is the author's punctuation, where the poem never ends but simply continues until the second to last stanza.

@sadie24 I agree with your response of the words "tacks" "splinters" etc. I think these words have nice diction that emphasize what they mean. Tacks and splinters bring up negative and often painful imagery, which is exactly what they represent on a metaphorical level: the pain in one's life. I like how the poem starts off with "well, son, I'll tell you" because it gives a subject and a direct statement that makes reading it more enjoyable.

@jungleboogie I agree 100% with your response to Frost's "Fire and Ice". I enjoy this poem both for its shortness and its mysteriousness. The mood left behind by Frost is depressed and, as you mentioned, perhaps apathetic to mankind. I like the first line, "some say", because it is general enough to pull the reader into the "some" and also gives the poem a direct audience. The rhyme scheme is also wavering, like Frost's decision between which way the world will most likely end. The ending also doesn't seem too depressed about the world ending with "suffice"; rather, he seems accepting of the fate.

Life is a privilege. Its youthful days
Shine with the radiance of continuous Mays.
To live, to breathe, to wonder and desire,
To feed with dreams the heart’s perpetual fire,
To thrill with virtuous passions, and to glow
With great ambitions – in one hour to know
The depths and heights of feeling – God! in truth,
How beautiful, how beautiful is youth!

Life is a privilege. Like some rare rose
The mysteries of the human mind unclose.
What marvels lie in the earth, and air, and sea!
What stores of knowledge wait our opening key!
What sunny roads of happiness lead out
Beyond the realms of indolence and doubt!
And what large pleasures smile upon and bless
The busy avenues of usefulness!

Life is a privilege. Thought the noontide fades
And shadows fall along the winding glades,
Though joy-blooms wither in the autumn air,
Yet the sweet scent of sympathy is there.
Pale sorrow leads us closer to our kind,
And in the serious hours of life we find
Depths in the souls of men which lend new worth
And majesty to this brief span of earth.

Life is a privilege. If some sad fate
Sends us alone to seek the exit gate,
If men forsake us and as shadows fall,
Still does the supreme privilege of all
Come in that reaching upward of the soul
To find the welcoming Presence at the goal,
And in the Knowledge that our feet have trod
Paths that led from, and must wind back, to God.

I took this poem because I really like the concept the poet wrote about. The syllabic pattern drops at some points but the structure of the poem goes AABBCCDD, as you can see. My favorite lines are "Pale sorrow leads us closer to our kind,
And in the serious hours of life we find
Depths in the souls of men which lend new worth
And majesty to this brief span of earth."

This is because when it says when in times of trouble, we reveal who we really are, then it goes back to "Life is a privilege"

I agree, and like the words you chose on how the mood changes, there deffinately is more of an innocence to the kid at the start of the poem as apposed to the end where he tries killing himself, the whole aspect of seeing the way things really are is what I like in this poem, because he eventually gets out of his little bubble.

[quote="Dark Woods"] the poem is something that can be enjoyed by older people as well. Phrases like "dark and shuttered" and "I know you're on the inside" are darker, and sort of accusing, not something you'd expect to find in a children's book, but good poetry nontheless.[/quote]
I agree with you completely on how this poem can be read and understood by kids and adults, I see it in a way of just some evil precence for children and more of a depression from the inside for adults